Frequently Asked Questions
What should we bring?

A lock is recommended for the lockers. A change of clothes if you plan on going upstairs to the play rooms,
lingerie, pj's, lounge pants, boxers, etc within your comfort level. The club is BYOB, so any alcohol you wish to
drink (we recommend this be in moderation), ID,and an open mind. Cel phones must be kept in locker must go
to car to make a call, NO calls in the club.

What items does the club provide?

We provide cups, ice and pop. On Saturday night we have food-dinner. We also provide the main dish for the
Pot Luck Dinners . There are towels for use with the shower and Hot Tub. Condoms for play, and we highly
recommend everyone practice safe sex. There are feminine products are available upon request.

So what happens when we arrive for the first time?

First we'll greet you at the door, please just walk right in. Then we'll ask you to fill out a membership information
card ( all information is kept strictly confidential) and show an ID. This card protects our members from the
media as well as law enforcement, it states you are not a member of either and if you are your at club for
entertainment purposes. It also covers the public nudity clause. Everyone must fill out this card completely, and
you too would want it filled out for your own protection by anyone who attends our parties. We'll then present
you with your personal TMP membership card, collect the fees, and then have one of the staff give you a tour
and go over everything with you. Feel free to ask question on the tour, our host couples are more than willing to
help make your experience at TMP a great one. The only dumb questions are the ones your afraid to ask. All of
our staff and many of the host couples have years of swinging experience and have been members of TMP for
quite some time, they aren't paid to do their jobs, but do so because they love the club and the lifestyle, they
party and play too and can help you to feel like a member of our little community.

We like to tell all new couples too upfront, you are never obligated to do anything you don't want to do with
anyone. A simple no thank you should be enough.

Is it ok for us to bring other people with us?

If you are bringing along a couple or single female, sure but we would like for them to call first as well, just like
any other new couple, just so we have the chance to speak with them.  If it is a single male, you must first call
the club and make sure we have room and let us know you plan on bringing a single, then he must call the club
so we can speak with him directly. A single male must come in with you and leave with you and remain with you
during your stay, if you don't think this is a problem then bring them after checking for availability. If you think
this might be a problem, recommend they go through our application and interview process, more information
about that is on the singles page.

Is it ok to tell other couples where the club is located?

No instead give them the phone number 269-657-4072 or the website, do not give
directions to the club or even where we are located, this protects our members. If someone wants to know a
location, tell them we're in the Kalamazoo area.

We're having a hard time finding people to talk with, and we're nervous, what should we do?

Find a staff member or host couple, they can introduce you to some of the more regular club members. We
have all been new at one time and we know it can be difficult to just walk up and start a conversation. Besides
being nervous, sometimes your just not sure who to approach, and where you sit has a lot to do with how
comfortable people are about pulling you into a conversation. People who tend to stick to the back corners,
don't seem to want to talk, this makes you look unapproachable to others. We have a great group of people that
come to the club on a regular basis, any of them are more than willing to talk with nervous newbies and try to
make you feel more comfortable about talking with people. Remember being nervous is normal, this will get
easier the more people you meet and the more times you come to parties.

What should we wear?

Our parties are much like a house party, and therefore pretty casual. We recommend no ripped up or dirty
clothing, remember a visual impression is what people see first, so dress to impress but be comfortable. If we
are having a dress up theme party you do not have to participate, but it's always more fun when you do, and our
regulars normally do dress up for the themes so this may make you feel a little more comfortable and help you
to fit in better. The newbies who have the best experiences tend to dress up for the themes and participate in
the games. It only makes sense to make yourselves apart of what ever the planned event is.

We've heard that couples set rules, how should we go about that, and what are some of the more
common ones?

Most couples set rules pertaining to how, when, and where they will swing. This is a good practice, if only to get
you as a couple talking. You should discuss everything involved with swinging before going to any party or
meeting anyone. Discuss your limits, and what your fantasies are. There's no right or wrong here except within
your own relationship. You have to do what works for you as a couple, don't let others tell you your rules are
dumb, or won't work. You need to do what you feel is right.

First you should determine what type of swingers are you, are you full swap (meaning you exchange partners
for everything)? Soft swap (you exchange partners for everything but intercourse)? Will you play alone or in the
same room? Do you even want to play on your first visit or do you plan on just observing and meeting people?
Maybe you only want to be with each other your first time and be watched?

Once you decide the what you will do, then move on to the how.  These would be your specific detail rules, such
as condom use, kissing, anal sex, that sort of thing. Decide what is ok and what's not for you to do as a couple.

When you've gotten all your rules discussed and you both understand them as a couple then stick to them.
Don't suddenly decide to bend your rules in the heat of the moment. We've seen this happen many times and
regrets usually follow, sometimes along with an argument, this is no fun for anyone. If you decide while at a party
you want to change something about your rules, we recommend waiting until you get home and have time to
discuss it away from the club and out of the heat of the moment. If it works for both of you then great change
them to suit your needs, but talk about it first.

One final note on rules, be honest with other people about them. Don't be afraid to tell someone what you
expect when you go off to play, it's so much easier for everyone involved if you all know upfront what's expected
and what's allowed. Not so much room for error.  Do not let anyone influence you into changing your rules to
suit their needs. If your rule is you only play with condoms only, just because he or she is really hot and you
want to play with them, but they refuse to use condoms. Don't let them make you think that it's ok to bend the
rules just this once. Stick to your rules, this is your life and your body, and someone else will eventually come
along that your just as attracted to that will go with your rules. Even singles should have some rules to go by
and what they expect when joining others, it's ok for you too to let people know what your expectations are

Is it ok for us to just come to a party and see what it's like without playing at all?

Absolutely ok, you never have to do anything you don't want to do. While we may try and persuade you to
participate in a game, dance or event, this is only for fun and not something you have to do if it makes you
uncomfortable. You never have to leave the meeting area (which is much like a bar) if you choose not to, it's all
up to you and your comfort level.  

I'm afraid of jealousy, or becoming jealous, how do I deal with this?

Jealousy is one of those things that happens from time to time. While this can be an awful feeling it isn't the end
of the world. It's all in how you deal with it. Talk with your partner, let them know why or what made you feel
jealous, sometimes the smallest thing such as a kiss or a touch can bring on those feelings and if your partner
knows that's what caused it, it may just be a simple adjustment of your rules is necessary or the way your
partner does a particular thing needs to change when they are in a swinging situation. The main thing to
remember is that your partner is going home with you, and not the person they are having sex with. If you can't
work out your feelings of jealousy or this is an intense feeling maybe this lifestyle just isn't right for you, or
maybe you and your partner need to take some time to work on insecurities within your own relationship before
trying swinging again. No matter what, communication is the key here.

We want to get more involved with the club and help out, what can we do?

There are lots of things club  members can do to help. First is being friendly to new club members, we all
remember what it was like when we were new, and there's nothing worse than going to a club and no one talks
to you. This isn't a problem at TMP, but if you see someone sitting off by themselves, introduce yourselves and
ask them to join you in conversation.  

Leave reviews for the club, on our home page is a list of sites that have reviews available for the club. New
people who find us on these sites read these reviews, tell them honestly what you think and help them make
informed decisions about the clubs they plan on attending. You should do this with all clubs you go to, it really
does make a difference.

Let others you talk to personally know about TMP, and why you like it there. Send them our website information.
Promote the club through your yahoo ID or web page, we'll even exchange links with you if you like. On some of
the swingers sites such as SLS, we list our events and this gives you the opportunity to sign up for them, do so
let others know you'll be attending a particular party. If your signing up for any of these sites like the ones listed
on our home page or links page, go through our site to sign up for them. TMP does receive some credits for
advertising and things like that for promoting some of these sites, and if your signing up anyway you can help
the club out by using our links.

Participate in the group and chat, be part of discussions, this gives people the opportunity to get to know others
before attending parties and makes them feel more apart of the community.  Participate in dress up themes and
games at the club, all of these things are planned to make everything more fun for everyone, and the more
people that participate the more fun to be had and the more people you get to know.

Clean up after yourselves, use the garbage cans provided in the rooms and bathrooms for condoms and
garbage. Put used towels in the towel cans.  Our staff is not paid, but they do clean the messes you leave
behind, help them out by not leaving such a big mess, and if you see something that needs attention, let one of
them know so they can take care of it right away, don't leave it for someone else to find.

What is the average age of people attending TMP Parties?
The Majority of our members fall in the 30's to 50's range, but we are a really diverse group and actually have
many other members on both sides of that average as well.

What is the Average Size of a TMP Party?

On Saturday night we average anywhere between 50 -70 people, with holiday parties generally being larger. Of
course these are just averages and the size does change from time to time based on events, and the weather
and even gas prices.

What if I have other questions this website didn't answer?

While we try and give as much information about the club and the lifestyle as possible, we may have missed
something that you have thought of or have a question about. Then just e-mail the club and ask away, or ask when you call, or while your on the tour at the club or
ask a staff member anytime.  We're here to help make your swinging experience a great one.